Tomorrow is my 16th birthday, and I honestly can't believe it. Like wow. But what is even more amazing is thinking about where I was at this time when I turned 15. I was a freshman, stressing about my biology final, wondering what the next year would bring, not even thinking that coming to Sweden would be in the cards. I think that that just goes to show how quickly things can change. I mean, I guess this wasn't a very quick change, I knew it 6 months before I was coming to Sweden, but it is still very drastic. But anyway, in my mind 16 is kinda a big deal, I mean if I was in Alaska I would be able to drive by myself and just for some reason is seems like 16 is just SO much older than 15 even though it really isn't. Still just some teenager. It's not like tomorrow I'm going to wake up and look totally different (well, I hope not), I'm not going to feel any different probabaly, or act any differently. Which makes me wonder why our society today makes such a big deal about birthdays. Like "wow, you lived another year! Congrats, let's give you presents for doing absolutely nothing besides getting older which is something everyone does!" Don't get me wrong, I love birthdays, I just don't quite get why we as people make such a big deal. I mean, I have never seen a squirrel or a moose set up birthday decorations and sing happy birthday.
It's going to be quite weird celebrating without my parents this year. Not having them come into my room at zero dark thirty, singing 'ja, må hon leva' while I pretend to be asleep until they scream at the end of song and eating cake and openin presents before school. It's almost like it doesn't feel real, that it's not actually my birthday tomorrow.
So, a side note. I actually did write this post a month ago the day before my birthday with total intentions of posting it, I just didn't and I haven't gotten around to it in a while. (clearly, so sorry about that) I do want to say something about my actually birthday now that is is over and done with.
My birthday was a great day, lots of congratulations, a wonderful dinner and celebration with great family friends but, I want to share a story with you. The morning of my birthday, I was waiting for my bus, just standing there like any other day and it kind of hit me like a train that wow, I'm not going to see my friends for another 6 months, I haven't seen my parents in 4 months and how excited I was to see them. I honestly almost started crying, which is something I hardly ever do or feel like doing. It was this time of great celebration, because as I said society just loves to make a grand deal about birthdays but, I couldn't help but feel this great feeling of sadness and joy all at the same time. It was confusing to say the least. Especially since in the U.S. 16 is kind of a age where you are expected to gain more responsiblity (I mean, they let us drive on our own), be more grown up, and yet still expected to abide by all of these rules set by schools and by our parents. It's almost as confusing as the feelings of sadness and joy I was feeling that morning at the bus stop. So, that was my birthday, I am going to write a whole separate blog now depicting my time here in Sweden with my family and the time afterwards, so I'll talk with you there!
